Iris
by NaraTemariS2
Summary: One-shot. First attempt at a SSMM. Post-HBP  Severus didn't give a damn about what others would say about him, but he couldn't' have her believing that... not her…


**Disclaimer: None o the character belong to me. I just thought I'd get this off my mind, Merlin knows it's been there long enough...**

**So this is my first attempt at a SSMM fic, but I hope you guys like it. I do realize that Sev may be a bit OC, but… well bear with me will yah? First time writing him =P**

**Anyway do leave a review okay? Just so I know what you guys think, it doesn't have to be big. And so I can improve for the next**

**Obs: I was thinking about the song "Iris" of Goo Goo Dolls when I started writing the fic, that's why the name is such.**

**Iris**

The castle looked different somehow. It's not like there were any broken windows, or any signs of that last confrontation. Minerva wouldn't have allowed that, but the absence of the students left it less bright. Actually it wasn't only the children that seemed to be missing. Most of the teachers must have probably left as well... For now, at least. Most, not all of them. She was certainly still here. She would not leave the school; she'd make sure everything was fine, at least in there. For his memory. For the memory of her best friend... The one that she believed he had murdered.

That would just not do. To hell with all the others, but she... She had to know the truth. She had always been there for him. When everyone else believed him traitor she had reached for him. Stood by his side. He wouldn't have her believing he killed her best friend. No... He'd have to make her see that he'd never hurt her so much if he had had a say in it. He still didn't know how, but she had to know the truth.

With a deep breath he straitened his invisibility cloak and opened the doors to the Great Hall. It was time.

He quickly walked through the familiar corridors. The turns that leaded to her bedroom were long ago learned by his heart. With a racing heart he faced her door and slowly and with a trembling hand, he knocked.

He was rather surprised when he heard footsteps coming without hesitation and the doorknob turning. Not even a question? Who could she possibly be expecting at this late hour?

"Pomona I already told you, I'm fi..." her beautiful green eyes narrowed as she didn't found who she expected. As she found no one. "Who's there?" she asked her hand flying to her pocket. He sneered, NOW she was being cautious. He watched her one last moment as she pulled her wand out with firm hands. With another deep breath he took his own wand and said "You should guard yourself better at times like this Minnie" before he mutely used expeliarmos to get her weapon. Though he really needn't have bordered. Her stern expression fell. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was slightly open. She was paralyzed.

"Sev... Severus?" her voice weak and husky.

He slowly pulled the cloak down to his neck. "Hello Minerva" he cringed inside as he realized that his own voice was not much better.

Emotions flashed through her eyes, but the last one manages to get to her whole body: fury. He had of course expected this. But it still made him curse himself and that damned man again.

"What are you doing here? What do you want?" she seemed more over the shock now, though her voice trembled a bit with anger. But she wouldn't do anything, of course. She was a Gryffindor (he never thought he would be grateful for that) so she wouldn't run away. And he held two wands, she, none.

"I will not harm you. I just want to talk." Her faced showed her disbelief. "Won't you invite me in?" he would at least be as polite as possible to make it easier for her.

"As if I have a choice" she said between clenched teeth. Taking a few steps back (her eyes never leaving his) she motioned for him to come in. He entered taking the rest of the cloak off.

"Such hostility, Minerva" he said smugly "There is no need for that."

"There is no need…" she started repeating but stopped. Took a deep breath and said with sarcasm "What then? You'd rather talk a bit over a cup of tea, I reckon?"

"Yes" his voice was serious. "Just like the old times, when we played chess or just talked while drinking tea or firewhiskey.

"Those times are over Snape, you made sure of it..."

"Believe me, I never meant for it to happen."

"Believe you! Why should I? There were few who trusted you, and you chose to murder one of them!" She yelled, not able to contain herself anymore. But that wasn't right! She had to make her see, make her understand!

"I did not… "

"Don't try to deny it Snape!" damn Scottish temper 'let me finish my phrases woman!' (And having her calling him Snape was getting on his nerves) "Mr. Potter saw you!" she all but yelled while walking behind her desk (probably trying to stop herself from attacking him), Severus muttered an abaffito charm in the room; it wouldn't be good if the others were to know of his visit. "He was unarmed! How could you!"

"Yes, well! I'm sure Potter must have told you a wonderful story' he sneered.

"What you could you possibly mean them!" She slammed her hands at the table in front of her. "That Potter was lying? That you didn't kill him? Them the bloody hell did you run!" Severus took a step back for a moment, of course he expected her to be mad, but this was something else. Her face showed her disbelief along with her anger.

"No, I don't deny it, but…"

"He pleaded you! Begged, did he not? And yet you murde…"

"I DID NOT MURDER HIM!" It was the Potions Master's turn to slam his hand at the table.

"You just said you did!" she was exasperated.

"I killed him, I did not murder him." He said calmer moving on step forward, closer to the table.

"Words! Just that. There's no real difference." Her voice was low now, but her voice was still angry.

"There is! I killed him because he asked me to. He made me promise him I'd do it." The silent that followed that sentence was heavy. His eyes were staring deeply into her wide ones. No surprise here. He hadn't meant to for it to come out like that but…

"Albus asked? I… what?" Her confusion was evident as was her resolution one minute later "You're insane. Albus would never have done that."

Of course that's what he would say. Again, no surprises here. "Minerva" he said leaning, the only thing separating them was her table, where their hands were still resting. "You were Albus friend, you knew him well, would he have begged for his life?"

"What?" she blinked, taken aback.

"Would he have begged for his own life?" he repeated the question. Her silence as what he had been waiting for. It was time to start telling truths.

"One year ago Dumbledore found a ring that belonged to the Dark Lord, and for reason that I cannot understand he put it on, without checking for any kind of curse that might have been placed there." He said, some of it through his teeth, but he was sure Minerva understood, as her eyes, still locked in his, narrowed. He needn't legilimens to know what she was thinking 'Why, by Merlin, would he do something so stupid'. "The ring, obviously, contained a curse, a deadly curse. Instead of coming to me right away he took his time!" he was angry now, remembering that was not pleasant "Oh I could contain the curse, but for a year only."

"A year? You don't mean that…" Minerva's shoulders had dropped down.

"Albus Dumbledore had his days counted? Yes I do. He had one year to live, give it or take a few days." Minerva broke eye contact and walked around the table passed through him and stood in front of a window.

"'One year to live?'" her voice showed how she didn't want to believe it "But he never told me about that. Never said one word about it. He said that his hand was just infected by some sort of new disease but that I shouldn't worry about it. That it would go back to normal in a few months." Severus took a few steps in her direction but stopped before getting too close (better not push his luck that much).

"He told no one. By that time he already knew that the Dark Lord had ordered Draco to kill him" Minerva turned so fast that it was a wonder she did not go dizzy.

"The Dark Lord had what?" her eyes were wide.

"Yes, the Dark Lord had told Draco to kill Dumbledore. He didn't expect the boy to succeed of course. It was a punishment for Lucius' incompetence. But the Dark Lord did want the Headmaster dead, and as Albus correctly guessed, he intended to send me to accomplish that task after the boy had failed."

Minerva's eyes narrowed at that "He guessed that you'd be sent to kill him?"

"Yes, and he of course wouldn't want Draco to kill him. He wouldn't want the boy to destroy himself, to damage his own soul." Severus said the last part through his teeth. He was still angry about that 'what about my soul Dumbledore?'. "And so Albus came with a brilliant plan" he didn't try to conceal his sarcasm "I'd be the one to kill him. That would make sure the boy's soul remained intact, the Dark Lord would trust me completely and he would have a clean death, with no agonizing torture performed by other Death Eater or by the curse in his hand." He paused and focused on a point above her head "And so he made me promise to kill him. Convinced me that he was dying anyway. And after that… after I promised him he made me swear that I'd tell no one about it. No one. 'I will be too dangerous. It's better that everyone thinks you are by his side'. I said no, of course, that I wanted to tell someone" he looked back at her, trying to let her know he was talking about her "but in the end, after hours of persuasion, he had me convinced that it would be better and less risky if no one else knew about our… arrangement."

"So he just told you to kill him?" Minerva said, he could feel her anger rising again, though this time it appeared to be out of confusion. He nodded "So you could remain on good terms with the Dark Lord?" He nodded again (there was the important fact about the Unbreakable Vow, but he could tell her about that latter… when -hopefully it would come to that- she wasn't that angry with him anymore, or at least when she trusted him again) "But…why?"

Now it was his turn to be confused "'Why' what?"

"Why did he believe in you so much? Was it the same reason that made you come back to our side? What is that reason that made him trust you so much as to 'ask' you to kill him? I want the truth Severus, no more lies. If you want me to believe in you, you'll have to tell me the whole truth."

So she wanted the truth? The whole truth? Damn her, he'd give it.

"You" he said simply. Looking deeply in her eyes.

"What?" she asked as if she hadn't heard him right.

"It's all because of you." he said nonchalantly, but his heart was beating so fast and hard it was a wonder for him that she couldn't hear it.

Had the situation been any other, he'd have mocked the look on her face. After all, it wasn't every day one managed to shock the stern Head of Gryffindor House, let alone leave her speechless like this.

"I...You..." she stammered a bit and Severus couldn't help himself, he smirked. And that seemed to do the trick. Minerva lost her nonsensical pose and went back to her usual self, albeit the shock was still there- for those who, like Severus, knew her enough to see through her facade "Excuse me? All because of me? What kind of nonsense is this?"

And now it was time. Severus knew it was going to come to this, there was no way Minerva would just take his word on things anymore, not after what happened... And not until he explained himself fully. But that was what he wanted no? For her to know the truth? The whole truth? Well that certainly didn't make saying it easier as he thought it would.

"I..." he started and then cursed inwardly, what was wrong with him?'Brace yourself man, and get over with it'. "Perhaps it would be better if we sit down... If I am to tell you this... Tale" he offered to gain just a bit more time. He nodded towards the chairs of her living room. Chairs in which he had sat countless times, for countless hours during the years of their friendship. 'Many of my happiest memories have happened here... And now, this.' Severus mused while Minerva hesitated just for five seconds - that passed far too fast for Severus liking- before nodding and accommodating herself in her favorite chair. Slowly Severus moved towards the chair in front of hers - the one he always used - and hesitated ever so slightly, as if asking for her permission to sit there, she understood the motion and after another brief hesitance nodded again, he took his seat.

"Where should I start then?" he said - though it was more to himself then her "My last years at Hogwarts? Or perhaps my years as Death Eater..."

Though it was not an actual question Minerva did answer, sharply "Start from where you wish, as long as you tell me the truth and where do I fit into it" He could see from her eyes that she herself thought she was being rude, but also that she wasn't going to apologize, not now.

"Right, then my years as a Death Eater might be the better start, get to the point quicker" at her nod, he started "I joined the Death Eaters because of a number of reasons, anger, greed - not for money, no thought that would have useful- but for power. Most of all I wanted to be recognized for my skills. As you know, my school years didn't teach me many ways on how to present myself to other in a good light - no, I don't blame my teachers" Severus said when he saw Minerva draw breath as if to interrupt him "Except, perhaps, Slughorn. I do however blame my fellow colleges in Slytherin and your four- three, actually, beloved Gryffindors" he saw the Gryffindor in Minerva frowning at this, but as she didn't interrupt him.

Now, however, she did interrupt "I am sorry for James, Sirius and to certain extend Remus, Severus. I know I, as a teacher should have-"

"I said I didn't blame my teachers and especially not you. I remember you telling, a few times, to the Headmaster" he was careful not to say Dumbledore's name "that the four of them should be punished more severely for their so called 'pranks'."

"You 'remember'?" she said raising an eyebrow.

Severus had the grace to look a bit ashamed. "Yes... I kind of used to eavesdrop on you two a bit." he saw that Minerva was trying to hide a smile - she was not that comfortable with him yet. "As any normal student, of course." Minerva just nodded (still holding back a smile) and motioned for him to go on - deciding to make no comments. "Yes well, anyway, I went to the Death Eaters and was accepted. At first it was what I wanted, or at least what I thought I did. Soon enough, I started seeing what it was really about, torture and murder. But that didn't faze me. I didn't come back, they recognized me there. The Dark Lord knew my abilities and though I was not one of his favorites yet, I was sure I could reach that. I was blinded by my greedy ambitions."

Minerva's eyes flickered with anger when he talked about what he had seen, and how he had not cared. Be that as it may, he had promised the truth, it was not exactly pleasant, but it was as it had happened.

"You said you weren't fazed. And that you were blinded. That means you opened your eyes to the cruelty later, that you began to care - I hope - why?" she asked her eyes never leaving his.

Severus was barely able to hold back a sneer. She asked for his tale, and now that he was telling she wanted to rush things? He just took a deep breath before saying "Indeed, I did." and ignoring her later question - that'd be answered soon - he continued his tale "The first time I really stopped to look at what I was doing, and what I was being a part of was after that battle on June. The one at a far off muggle village. A battle in which you participated."

"I do remember that battle, it was the first time I saw you after you joined him." she said and the disappointment in her voice and eyes were enough to make Severus feel as ashamed as he had the first time, for doing what he had done. She was not holding her emotions from him anymore for which he was glad - though he wished there was another emotion there.

"Yes... I remember that night clearly. It was, as I said, the night I started to think about what I was doing. After I saw the disappointment on your face."

"Why my face?"

"But I shouldn't care. It shouldn't bother me. But it did." he continued as if she had said nothing at all "Every time that I'd curse someone, I'd see your face, as real as I had that night." Severus couldn't take it anymore and finally broke eye contact, burring his face into his hands. But before Minerva could so much as process the sudden display of emotion he began talking again, as if in a trance "I started to do things mechanically, the Dark Lord could never know what pledged me. I still don't know how I did it- perhaps it was the missing feelings that brought me to his real attention-" now it seemed as if he was talking to himself rather than her "but I was suddenly on a small reunion, by Lucius' side. A private reunion in which only the 'closest'-if you could say that - to the Dark Lord were attending." He took yet another deep breath and rearranged himself on the chair, his head back up, though he dared not to meet her eyes. "He, the Dark Lord, had heard of my hatred for Gryffindors, by none other than 'my good friend' Lucius" Severus was sure his irony had showed, along with his hatred. Though he had liked the man once and knew it wasn't really his fault, he couldn't help but to blame Lucius upon what was about to be suggested by the Dark Lord.

"'Hatred for Gryffindors'?" Minerva repeated raising an eyebrow. Severus never heard her attempt at mood-lighting; he was remembering what happened next.

"And so I would, of course, be very much glad about his next plan to take action." the former Head of Slytherin stopped. He was sure Minerva could see the turmoil of emotions in his face, even though he tried to hide it. He still remembered the horror and the shock that he felt. And how everything had changed then...

"What was it?" Minerva asked after a full minute of silence - Severus hadn't realized that he had fallen silent for that long. He lunches forward, finally reaching the crucial moment of his tale "His next plan was to murder you. Minerva McGonagall, Deputy Headmistress, Head of Gryffindor House and the right hand of Albus Dumbledore."

Severus finally looked back at her. And saw that she no longer looked at him, and did not look surprised, nor worried but a bit... Confused. But for some reason he knew that the confusion had nothing with the Dark Lord's plan, but with the importance he had laid on that fact. As she said nothing, he decided to ask "You knew?"

She looked back to him "I didn't knew he had made important plans to kill me, though I knew he wanted me dead." she said simply. Severus waited for her to elaborate. How could she say it like that? The Dark Lord had been after her; she knew it and took no precautions? Damn Gryffindors!

Minerva sighed; she apparently had realized that the Slytherin was not going to say anything else until she explained. "It was as you just said Severus" he was pleased to hear her speak his name again "I was... Al..Albus' right hand and his friend. Of course I was a target."

"And you didn't care?" he asked in disbelief.

The Transfiguration Professor rolled her eyes "Of course I cared Severus, I'm not a suicidal" he sneered at that "But I was not going to lay back while everyone else was fighting. I'd never run away from the fight. And ... Albus knew that. He'd have to lock me up to prevent me from joining the fight."

"Yes... Lock you up would have been an easy solution." said Severus, and before he got up and started walking back and forth in the room he saw Minerva raising an eyebrow at that.

"Excuse me?"

Severus looked at her and couldn't help a small smile. Her expression - a mix of surprise, disbelief, anger and perhaps... No not that...- was far too funny for him to restrain himself.

"I did consider kidnapping you. For one week after the Dark Lord told me his plan, I considered that. I had to do something, I couldn't just let you die." he shuddered at the thought.

"Why not?" Minerva asked. He sneered and continued.

"During that week everything changed. I wasn't able to watch others dying or being tortured anymore. Every time I saw one of them, my mind would go back to you. That that could be happening to you. And I couldn't take it. I ran."

It appeared as if Minerva was still angry for having her question ignored, but now the confusion that had already been there grew more prominent. Severus fought back a smirk; she just couldn't help herself, could she?

"You ran? Had you gone mad? Where did you run to? Had he found out you'd be dead" She said exasperated.

Severus allowed a small smile after hearing her concern for his safety. "It was better than the alternative." he answered looking into her eyes. She seemed to draw back from his certainty at putting her life before his like that. Apparently she was finally understanding... Oh joy

"Anyway, I ran to the one person who would consider hearing me. Albus Dumbledore." A shadow of hurt passed through her eyes. Whether because of hearing the old man's name or because Severus had gone to him and not her he didn't know. Just in case it was the later he added "Had I gone to you, you'd have taken me to him anyway. That way I could prevent you from hearing what was bound to come out when Albus started to question me." Less hurt then before Minerva opened her mouth to ask something - not that it wasn't obvious what - so Severus cut her off - he was rather enjoying doing that, and from the look on her face she knew that.

"Arriving at the front gates I was lucky enough to find Hagrid walking close by, he had probably just arrived. I called after him."

"You must have scared him to death." the woman in front of him said with eyes a bit wide. Severus nodded. It had not being his brightest idea, but what else could he have done?

"Yes... He was rather stlarted. After the initial shock, his hand flew to his umbrella. By that time I had already taken out my wand and showed it to him flat in my palm while I said I wasn't going to hurt him; that I just wished to speak with professor Dumbledore. He didn't believe me"

"I'd hope not. After all you were a know Death Eater."

"Indeed... Huh...his face was rather amusing..." he said

FLASHBACK

Severus was still holding his hand faced up with his wand laid on it. Though that didn't appear to calm the gamekeeper much. Or at all.

"Stay put or I'll..." he said shakily pointing his umbrella toward Severus. And had the dark wizard not been in a hurry he would have mocked the half-giant. As if he could take Severus down.

"I said I'm not here to fight! Damn it Hagrid, I must speak with the Headmaster at once!" but Hagrid didn't seem to believe him yet. Cursing again he took hold of his wand and took a few steps back. The other wizard stayed put. " Here" Severus said throwing his wand on by the gate, it was now closer to Hagrid then to himself. He hated being without it, but he had to speak with Dumbledore. "I have no wand, open the gates and take it, but please let me go see Professor Dumbledore." he hated that his voice sounded like he was begging - never mind that really was.

Hagrid lowered his wand a bit, but still didn't seem to trust him. "What game are you playing Snape?" he took a step forward.

Severus sighed; he just wanted to make sure she'd be alright as quickly as possible, was that too much to ask? "No games Hagrid." he said with a tired voice, the other took a few steps forward and was now standing at the gates. Severus didn't move just looked at the giant in the eyes. "I need to speak with Professor Dumbledore..." Hagrid was still frowning. Damn it. "It's about Miner... Professor McGonagall's safety. Hagrid please..."

And Severus didn't know if it was because he mentioned Minerva, the word 'please' or other thing entirely, but a few seconds later, still looking in Severus eyes, Hagrid opened the gates. And as much as he wanted he didn't move, least the giant would think he was going to attack him. The gamekeeper took Severus' wand and pocked it, before making room for the Death Eater to enter. Sighing with relief Severus entered the school and muttered a 'thank you'.

"Don't thank me yet." Hagrid said, his voice unusually grave. But after he had closed the gates and looked back at Severus, he saw the giant didn't look as mistrustful as he had before. With the umbrella still at hand he started walking in the castle's direction. "Follow me" he said over his shoulder with the same tone. Quickly and quietly Severus began to follow the man, hoping against hope that the Headmaster would believe him.

The corridors. It seemed so long ago that he'd walk around, trying to avoid the 'Marauders', hurrying up to his classes or to the library... It seems like a lifetime ago...

Luckily, there were neither students, nor professors out of bed in this late hour.

In front of the statue, Hagrid said the password and the gargoyle moved aside. The giant stepped up first, knocking on the door with Severus right behind him. After what seemed like far too many minutes for the dark haired wizard, they heard movement on the other side of the door along with the firm voice of the Headmaster "Who is there?"

Hagrid answer promptly "It's me professor Dumbledore. I am sorry to disturb you at this late hour, but a complicated situation happened, you see..."

The minute Hagrid started talking, Severus heard the Headmaster opening the door. The old man looked pretty much the same he had when Severus was a school boy, after all not many years had passed. The main difference was in his eyes. That hateful twinkle in his eyes was no more. His expression was sombre, and his eyes narrowed the minute they laid on Severus.

"I trust you have a good reason for bringing him inside the school Hagrid?" he spoke calmly, but Severus could see the mistrust in his eyes and lowered his head a bit in shame, but their eyes were still locked.

"Yes Professor, he gave me his wand" answered the half-giant giving Dumbledore said wand, the Headmaster took it never looking away from Severus "And he mentioned Professor McGonagall sir."

That made Dumbledore look at Hagrid with eyebrows a bit raised, Severus then let his own eyes drop to the floor. He had to believe him; Severus couldn't even dare think of what could happen if he didn't.

"Professor McGonagall? What about her?" behind yet the calm exterior, Snape could hear a worried tone, and that gave him hope. Looking back up he saw that both men were looking at him; Hagrid started to open his mouth, but Severus was quicker, it was high time he started talking. Ignoring Hagrid, he tried to make his voice sound cold.

"Professor McGonagall is in grave danger, sir. The Dark Lord wants her... Dead..." Damn! That small hesitation was bound to have consequences later. The old man would have noticed it.

The two wizards looked at each other for another minute, before Dumbledore slowly turned to Hagrid and spoke calmly, but in a tone that clearly said that he was ordering something. "Hagrid, it is rather late, why don't you go back to your house? I'll deal with Mr. Snape from here on. Thank you for bringing him in."

Hagrid gave the Headmaster a small bow a said Good Night, turning to Severus he just nodded muttering 'Snape' and went on his way. Only when the giant's footsteps died away that the Headmaster addressed Severus again.

"We should take this inside Mr. Snape. Come in a take a sit." his voice was cordial but the imperativeness of it was still there while he stepped back. Severus entered the room... It was not the first time he entered Albus Dumbledore's office, though of course this time he was no student. He was a grown man... Then why did he feel like a very bad behaved student when he sat across Dumbledore by the Headmaster's table? The Headmaster pulled Severus wand out of his pocket and examined it. Then putting it on the table between them, he raised his eyes to Severus. "What is the meaning of this?" his voice still cold and his hand motioned over the wand.

"I...I came..." great now he was making a fool of himself, put yourself together man! Taking a deep breath Severus held his head high and looking straight into those damned blue eyes he said "I came here to tell you the Dark Lord's newest plan. And to give myself in". Huh. That made Dumbledore pleased for some reason... The old wizard leaned back on his chair and asked.

"Is that so? Hum... And which plan would that be?" the tone was grave and interested, but that damn twinkling was back there.

Severus leaned forward in his chair. This was it. He had to convince Dumbledore... Her life depended on it. So, with a tone as grave as the Headmaster's he looked straight in the older man's eyes and spoke "As I said, the Dark Lord wishes to kill Min - Professor McGonagall" his black eyes ignited in anger of what his 'master' wanted to do... At the same time that he stopped himself from thinking that he could succeed - No. Severus was here so that he wouldn't. The headmaster nodded for him to continue, Severus couldn't tell what he was thinking, the twinkle was there still but not as before, most of Dumbledore's face was blank. The man still did not trust Severus- the Death Eater had caught him off-guard by the door. "And he plans to do so in a single attack once the term ends. The moment she goes to her house in Scotland. He expects to attack with a number of Death Eaters by his side, but he'll want to deliver the final blow." the last words he said through his teeth, in a poor contained anger. On hearing this, Dumbledore moved forward and stared deeply in Severus eyes. He thought about blocking his mind but decided against it - he had to convince Dumbledore, it didn't matter what he found out, Severus was as good as in Azkaban once he finished telling this to the Headmaster or as good as dead if he was released and the Dark Lord found him. Them as if finding something rather pleasant, Dumbledore gave a small nod to himself and got up heading towards one of the Headmistress in a portrait.

"My dear, would you mind telling Minerva to co-" Snape realized what the headmaster was going to say and jumped of his chair, that alone made the headmaster stop and look at him inquisitively along with the rest of the portraits.

"Professor Dumbledore please don't call her here" damn, why did he have to say please!

The man frowned slightly "And why not Mr. Snape? This is of her concern"

Severus felt foolish, but he wasn't going to back down. "I'd rather not let her know I was the one informing it.." the headmaster raised an eyebrow and that damn twinkle grew again. "I'd rather not let her know this at all."

"Oh?" he said and his tone now was slightly amused "And why not Mr. Snape?"

Severus fought against himself not to blush "'Cause that would worry her... Or she might not take my warning seriously. Or, should she believe me, she'd say she needn't any protection- this last scenario being more likely." he said simply, as if it was obvious. Dumbledore stared at him for another moment before chuckling and turning to the portrait again "Tell Minerva that I need to speak with her on the morning please." he said turning back to Severus and seeing the look in his eyes completed "I won't tell her anything if don't want me to, I'll just say I'll need some help on the first week of Vacation and ask if she would, please, help me here in the school. After that I'd find an excuse to accompany her to her home, just in case." Severus felt himself relax in relief- a big mistake "You were right of course, she'd say that. It seems that you know my Deputy rather well, Severus" Severus blushed deeply at the implication and the voice used by the Headmaster (an amused and happy one). But he couldn't help frowning when he realized what he had called him 'Severus'. And ignoring the blush on his face, Severus looked the Professor questiongly.

Dumbledore smile, but his face was serious again. "I have a proposition for you Severus. You said you would give yourself in, no?" Severus did not know where this was going, but he had gotten what he wanted, Minerva would be safe. It didn't matter now what would happen to him, so he just nodded. "What if..." the Headmaster sat again behind his desk and Severus followed suit in his own chair. His face blank as he looked to Dumbledore. "What if I could give you a way out?" Severus frowned but remained silent when the old man raised his hand "Minerva would still be safe, and you could still be... Free"

"There is no hiding from him" Severus said.

"Oh no. I wasn't going to suggest hiding." his face was now serious.

Severus took a deep breath, free... But the hesitation before... Did he mean? "Professor" he started and the Headmaster nodded "Are you suggesting that I... I should become a spy?"

Dumbledore gave him a small smile and said "Yes. It's better, my boy, than other alternatives." the twinkle was back... "You wouldn't be killed by Voldemort" Severus cluched his left arm "Neither would you be arrested. And you oclumencie's skills are excellent, he wouldn't find out."

Severus was silent for a while. It was indeed a good, the best, actually, option. He didn't want to go to Azkaban after all... But... "The Dark Lord would notice my absences, every time I had to report to you. He knows I have no family. He'd get suspicious if he heard that I was coming to Hogwarts every month or so." he said shaking his head.

But Dumbledore's smile grew larger "Not, if he is the one ordering you to" Severus mind went blank.

"What?"

The professor chuckled "Did you know that Professor Slughorn is retiring? The Potions Master position would be vacant and I'd be desperate for someone who could become a Professor..."

Recovering, Severus got the cue "I'd tell the Dark Lord that, and offer myself as his spy to your side. I'd tell him that I could make up a story in which regretted all I had done. You'd give me a second chance. And so..."

The Headmaster completed "And so you'd work in Hogwarts by his own orders." That could.. No, that would work. He nodded, and that would allow him to spent more time by her side again. He would be able to redeem himself in her eyes. "Yes. Professor Dumbledore, if you'd have as Potions Mater, I will become your spy."

Dumbledore got up once again and smiled broadly at Severus, offering his hand. Severus got up and shook it "Welcome to the staff of Hogwarts, Professor Snape."

Severus blushed a bit but still held his head high "I still have to convince the Dark Lord, Headmaster"

"Oh I'm sure you'll do it just fine." The old man said sitting again, content "Tea, Severus?" having the Headmaster calling him by his first name would get some using to, he nodded and Dumbledore called a house elf to order the drink. "You have, after all, a reason to work here, so you'll try your best, and I'm sure that'll be enough."

Severus raised his eyebrow to the Headmaster, while the elf came back with their tea. "Yes, staying alive."

The old wizard chuckled "I dare say that that's not the only reason" his were twinkling more than ever, and Severus began to feel uncomfortable again, the conversation had already covered that, no? Why talk about it again? As Severus said nothing the Headmaster leaned forward in his chair and said "Isn't that right, Severus?" Damn that man!

"I don't know what you're talking about Headmaster" he said nonchalantly- though he knew he was not fooling that old meddler.

"Come on now, my boy. We are both adults here, about to be colleagues. There is no shame in having the feelings you do for my dear Deputy." he said with a light and amused voice that made Severus start to contradict him.

"I don't feel..." but he stopped. Looking in those blue eyes of the Headmaster he didn't see disgust, but... Happiness? The old man was actually happy that he was feeling this? Well, there was no use in denying it. Dumbledore already knew it anyway. Taking a deep breath he said it.

FLASHBACK OFF

"And so I said it." Severus was sombre. And Minerva couldn't help herself (he noticed) she had to ask, just like Albus, she had to hear him say it. Though he supposed she had more of a right to ask this of him.

"Said what?" her voice was barely above a whisper.

"Shall I quote myself?" he inquired ironically while looking away, the irony help to mask his true feelings at least "'I love her, I'm in love with Minerva McGonagall'" and turning his eyes back to hers (her month was slightly open, but her eyes showed no recognizable emotion)"Unquoting, I love you."

She had apparently lost the ability to speak, so Severus finished "That's why I came back. That's why I fought against the Dark Lord's forces, why I protected Potter(that is you were so keen on doing so, I wanted to help you), why I decided to work here and why the headmaster trusted me. All because of my feelings for you."

Minerva simply looked at him. Deep into his eyes, and Severus didn't look away. His defenses were low; he wanted her to believe him. And then her eyes changed, it was like she was filled with a powerful feeling and it was not hated or disbelief. She relaxed her stern posture and took a tentatively step forward, her lips turning slightly upwards, and she had one last question.

Severus simply answered; a fire of hope was burning inside of him. "I do love you, very much so."

Minerva's smile broadened - apparently she believe him - and closed the distance between them.

Severus heart fluttered happily as he took the woman he loved in his arms.


End file.
